


You're north of Heaven, Maybe somewhere west of Hell.

by Gallavicher (Gobblepotle)



Series: Song Inspired Stories. [9]
Category: Shameless US - Fandom
Genre: Debbie Gallagher (mentioned), F/M, Insecurity, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, Suicide, bipolar disease, negativity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-14
Updated: 2014-07-14
Packaged: 2018-02-08 19:16:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1952904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gobblepotle/pseuds/Gallavicher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>what happens when ian stop taking his meds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You're north of Heaven, Maybe somewhere west of Hell.

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: Read at your own risk, remember to do not copy any of what you read, don't try it in yourself, don't be stupid... if you got depression, you are bipolar, sensitive, or you are a minor, teenager etc... DON'T READ IT.

Ian head told him loads of things, every day, every fucking second, his brain would never rest, all the negative thoughts, of how worthless he was, how he was ruining everyone life, that he should take a gun and just shot himself on his head, everything was so fucking wrong, sure he was depressed, he had choose to live with it instead of look like a fucking zombie for all the pills he had to take, so one day, he just decided, 'no more, no more pills', that day would be only the beginning.

Mickey, he said he was buying,,, he had to go to the super and buy some food for him and his boyfriend, he never thought it would be a bad idea to leave the house that day, since he never knew ian stopped taking the meds about a month ago after ian proposal  
Not knowing that maybe, just maybe, he would never get to the wedding.

Ian's head was rushing, was so mental, so depressed, so suicidal that none of them see it coming, with no milkovich in the house, with the gallaghers in their house, Ian was completely alone, since mickey would had to go buy some food for them two..  
Ian brain was telling him, how to feel, how worthless, useless, negatve enought to pull the trigger and just vanish from this world.

"I will save  
you from yourself  
Time will change  
everything about this hell  
Are you lost?  
Can't find yourself?  
You're north of Heaven  
Maybe somewhere west of Hell"

For sure his life was a hell, and for sure he just wanted to stop this thoughts, to stop crying for everything, just stop his moods, for good... meds would make him feel a zombie, so why take them? without the meds he would feel so negative, so lost that he would never would be able to find his old self, he knew he never would be able to be the same ian he was before, times change, somes for better, somes for worst, with ian was no different, since destiny had plans for him and wasnt the good ones, he just decided what to do at the last minute, he just wanted to save everyone he loved, to free them from the chains of what ian had become, he felt no other than a weight in everybody shoulders, so useless, so worthless, he had to end it and he would end it now... So he grab one of the thousand mickey's guns, he check out to be sure he had bullets in it, even if he just needed one, he lock himself in the milkovich bathroom, he could see the broken mirror and understand that, how the mirror was, it was his life as well... broken, with no use, empty.

Mickey would had comeback from super with the groceries in hand, so many yummy stuff to share with his partner, when he heard it.. no matter how fast he run to where he hear the noise, it was too late, he broke the bathroom door, he was there, sitting next the toilet, in the floor down the sink, lifeless, his partner, finally had found peace, he was no longer anyone dead weight on their shoulders, he would stop feeling so wothless, useless, he would stop feeling like a zombie, he was just like everybody else... free.

At this mickey stayed frozen in his place, until he heard mandy coming from outside, he replied to mandy with a "huh?" when she asked what he was doing standing like a mummy, then reality kicked in... he started mumbling "Call the 911" at mandy saying "What?" he yelled "Call the damn ambulance" this time with tears in his eyes, he sounded broken, he didn't move from his place, standing still, he heard his cellphone ringing in his hand, he didn't noticed he was holding "Hello?" "Who is this?" mickey said, "It's Fiona, just calling to know how is he" He heard saying, "he's dead" he replied in a mumble, but enough shocked, like a zombie, with no feeling, only emptiness in his voice, but enought loud for fiona to hear him.. "He left me, he killed himself" he said crying, broken to fiona who was at the phone, this time she was quiet, he could feel her holding her mouth so he couldn't hear her crying, but he knew she was, mandy came back saying, "they are on their way" and mickey nooded, passing the phone to a histerical Lip who now was talking to mickey, yelling actually, seeking for answers, at this time mandy was on the phone telling to lip to calm down, they already called 911 and lip with a smart answer telling her "how the fuck you expect me to calm down, my little brother is dead" well mandy could see the obvious but she didn't answer at that, then she said, well ambulance is here, come down here to say good bye and then she rushed to open the door as she hung up the phone, still with mickey standing still in the same place in shock, police didn't had to do questions about it since ian lifeless body was lying there in the bathroom floor in his undies and a gun in his right hand and most of his brain sprawled everywhere, in the sink, in the walls, everywhere, then mickey react, going outside to throw up, crying, cursing, yelling with pain, mumbling as lip was runnign at him wanting to punch him, for not take care of his little brother, but he stoped because the police was already there and he didn't wanted to get arrested or he would be thrown out off the uni, and he wanted to see his brother, yell him to wake up, with tears all over his face, he knew he wasn't sleeping, but yet he wouldn't accept the reality, not like fiona did, finding lip body, to hug him tight and leaning a shoulder for him and her to cry, as they see the lifeless body of ian go, sure mickey would be the one to go with them, fiona said she would go in the las moment, snce she was the one who supposed to take care of him, already knowing she did a bad job at that  
Hours passed, nobody talking, till fiona and a zombie still shocked mcikey with still red eyes of being crying a ot came to the gallagher house, mandy was there as well, sh had to explain everything to lip and debbie (she was all grown up by now" so she could hear this kind of chat by now, "so, how he is?" ask lip, still not wanting to hit the reality, at that fiona look at him wth a sad hopeless look "still dead" she reply, mandy can see his brother starting tocry all over again, so she rus to hug him tight, they all stayed in silence for a while, some of them not wanting to talk, some others cheering up to mickey who still was sobbing but like catatonic, and some of them yet not wanting to fall intothe reality, that Ian the ginger boy of the gallaghers/milkovich family would never wake up, he would never live again to see another day...

 

"You're north of Heaven  
Maybe somewhere west of Hell..."

**Author's Note:**

> fic inspired in the 30 seconds to mars lyric "Birth"


End file.
